Christmas of Helplessness

Too many years of trying to lift and carry everything myself have finally caught up with me. So, this year at Christmas I will be in the process of recovering from back surgery. The timing of this procedure has been beyond inconvenient for myself and my family, but God gives grace. The main thing is, I just don’t do helpless very well. Not at all.

Experiencing this surgery/recovery at this season got me thinking about the Christmas story.  God incarnate became one of the most helpless beings on the planet. The human baby pales pathetically compared to most other newborn creatures in its ability to survive on its own. It cannot warm or feed itself, cannot stand or run or hide. It is completely dependent on communicating its needs for all of the above by weak utterances that hopefully someone will care enough to interpret. Apart from its ability to cry out, it is totally helpless and dependent.

Fortunately for me, I have been surrounded by family members who have bent over backward, literally since I cannot, to take care of me in my recovery. The helpless Christ child had Mary and Joseph, but even they were overwhelmed by the extremities of their experience.

They were powerless against a decree that required their travel. They had to be dependent on the mercy of others for even the most basic shelter. They were helpless to prevent the coming of the birth for a more convenient time and place. They were dependent on the generosity of others who provided gifts which financed their escape as refugees into Egypt. Poor Joseph was so overwhelmed, yet could not turn to his family for advice or counsel as would have been the order of the day; he waited completely dependent on messengers from God for direction.

This enforced helplessness has been for me a sort of fasting of self-sufficiency.  There’s suddenly a whole range of physical movements and activities that I have had to give up doing for myself. I cannot image God allowing for Himself the limitations of a human baby! I just really want to put on my own socks!

Why would God choose such a humble helplessness of beginning? Hebrews 4: 15 is one answer: “For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin.” The mediator between my soul and God needed to understand helplessness. My tendency to want to handle it all myself rather than be dependent even when it means I hurt myself…how much I hate to ask for help…how hard it is to trust others to do what needs to be done…maybe really at the heart of it- how hard it is to trust Him and not to protect and defend myself.

I have an overwhelming respect and admiration for Joni Eareckson Tada and others like her, who have allowed God to use their helplessness and dependency to minister to others.

“My wheelchair was the key to seeing all this happen—especially since God’s power always shows up best in weakness. So here I sit … glad that I have not been healed on the outside, but glad that I have been healed on the inside. Healed from my own self-centered wants and wishes.”
Liked!
 

“The weaker I am, the harder I must lean on God’s grace; the harder I lean on him, the stronger I discover him to be, and the bolder my testimony to his grace.” Joni

2 Corinthians 12:9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

I have never thought of this verse in connection to the Christmas story, but how true it is that God’s power was made perfect in the weakness of a tiny baby. Only God could do that!

Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly in my weakness, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Amen! Let it be.

Missing Meekness

Humble, or meek, is the way that Christ self-identified in Matthew 11:29. “For I am meek and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” There is also the incredibly poetic prophecy of Christ in Isaiah 42:3. “A bruised reed he shall not break, and the smoking flax he shall not quench; he shall bring forth justice faithfully.” Somehow, Christ can bring forth justice so gently that even an already bent stalk or the last little spark on a candle’s wick will not be snuffed out in the process.

The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines meek as “having or showing a quiet and gentle nature: not wanting to fight or argue with other people.” I wonder if anyone else misses the days when followers of Christ were known for their meekness?  When did it become acceptable by Christians on social media to treat “stupid people” (defined as anyone who disagrees with the person posting) with mockery, contempt, and even cruelty?

Numbers 12:3, describes the Old Testament hero Moses in the following manner: “the man Moses was very humble, more than all the men on the face of the earth.” The single incident when Moses took it upon himself to straighten out the unruly bunch of whiners he was leading did not end well for him. If God punished him by refusing to allow him to go into the promised land for lashing out verbally at the people and for striking the rock; how much more grieved He must be by our angry outbursts and name-calling.

Moses was certainly correct in his assessment of the character of the people he was leading. That becomes the problem when we are so certain that we are right and the other party is wrong. Dallas Willard has this incredibly applicable perspective on being “right” from his book Hearing God.

“Indeed, being right is one of the hardest burdens human beings have to bear, and few succeed in bearing up under it gracefully. There is a little placard I have seen that reads, ‘Lord, when we are wrong, make us willing to change, and when we are right, make us easy to live with!’ A very wise prayer.”

It is also extremely difficult not to retaliate when we are the one that is being attacked. But even angry, accusatory unjust words do not have to change who we are. Just because someone is throwing mud does not mean we have suddenly become a pig and must go wallow in the pigpen.  As Thomas `a Kempis states in his Imitation of Christ,

“Don’t have your peace depend on what other men may say about you: whether they interpret your actions rightly or wrongly, you are still what you are.”

What we are is the vessel that holds the light and love of God that he wants to pour out to a hurting frightened world. 2 Corinthians 4:7 reminds us, “But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, the excellency of the power being from God and not from ourselves. Ultimately, what is at stake in our actions is the very reputation of Christ. To follow him and to be identified with him is counter-cultural to what is considered to be acceptable behavior at the moment. Oswald Chambers says it so well,

“The teaching of the Sermon on the Mount is not, “Do your duty,” but is, in effect, “Do what is not your duty.” It is not your duty to go the second mile, or to turn the other cheek, but Jesus said that if we are His disciples, we will always do these things. We will not say, “Oh well, I just can’t do any more, and I’ve been so misrepresented and misunderstood.” Every time I insist on having my own rights, I hurt the Son of God, while in fact I can prevent Jesus from being hurt if I will take the blow myself. That is the real meaning of filling “up in my flesh what is lacking in the afflictions of Christ…” (Colossians 1:24). A disciple realizes that it is his Lord’s honor that is at stake in his life, not his own honor.

Never look for righteousness in the other person, but never cease to be righteous yourself. We are always looking for justice, yet the essence of the teaching of the Sermon on the Mount is— Never look for justice, but never cease to give it.”

The way to give justice in a Christ-like manner is so gentle that it doesn’t break the bruised reed, it is spoken so softly that the last tiny spark of the smoldering wick is not extinguished.

What time is it?

This blog is not the first time I have written regarding Solomon’s wise words in Ecclesiastes. See  http://estherrigsby.com/2014/07/04/just-a-piece/ . However, after one of the most hectic summers of my life, I feel compelled to return to it.

Ecclesiastes 3. (ESV)
For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven:

a time to be born, and a time to die;
a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
a time to kill, and a time to heal;
a time to break down, and a time to build up;
a time to weep, and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
a time to seek, and a time to lose;
a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
a time to tear, and a time to sew;
a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
a time to love, and a time to hate;
a time for war, and a time for peace…

He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also, he has put eternity into man’s heart, yet so that he cannot find out what God has done from the beginning to the end.

I said goodbye this morning to my youngest child as he went to board a plane bound for college. Letting go of my children has never been an easy thing for me to do, even though by number four I ought to know the drill by now. No worries, due to other circumstances, I am not an empty nester, that is not the problem. It is just that I have learned by now that they never come home as the same person. 

I have not read the entirety of Thomas Wolfe’s You Can’t Go Home Again, but I feel like the watcher in this quote who knows from experience the road before my young pilgrim.

“Child, child, have patience and belief, for life is many days, and each present hour will pass away…You have stumbled on in darkness, you have been pulled in opposite directions, you have faltered, you have missed the way, but, child, this is the chronicle of the earth. And now, because you have known madness and despair, and because you will grow desperate again before you come to evening, we who have stormed the ramparts of the furious earth and been hurled back, we who have been maddened by the unknowable and bitter mystery of love, we who have hungered after fame and savored all of life, the tumult, pain, and frenzy, and now sit quietly by our windows watching all that henceforth never more shall touch us – we call upon you to take heart, for we can swear to you that these things pass.”

Time, it too shall pass.

The same week that we sent one off to college, we celebrated the fourth birthday or our granddaughter, and we also brought one of our parents home from the hospital following an illness. Time passes.

What I have found is that only by living with eternity in our hearts can we truly see the beauty that God is making in the times of our lives. Otherwise just grieving the losses that we experience over time would overwhelm us.

Now lest this post become too maudlin even for an Eeyore, like me, let me conclude with the following:

I am quite certain that my rock-carrying, garden-building big son who left for college this morning is glad that Solomon in his great wisdom included that there is a time to gather stones and a time to cast them away.

Keep eternity in your heart my son; God is going to make all things beautiful in His time!

Need a Guide?

Best ever guide in Mongolia

Anyone who has ever gone on a tour to a place of historical or cultural significance will be familiar with following a guide. We have had numerous encounters both good and bad throughout the years we have traveled.  The best are passionate about their history and/or religious perspective. The worst drone on through hours in the hot sun just doing their job.

The point is, that without the guide -my chances of getting lost, committing some horrible social faux pas, wandering into restricted areas and getting shot or jailed, increase dramatically. Without a guide, there is also simply the failure to be able to communicate with the locals and the inability to understand and appreciate their culture.

God knows that we need guidance!

We need guidance to meet our basic physical needs. (Like the wonderful driver in Northern India who could always seem to find me a bathroom in remote locations. Bless him!)

That’s the driver- on the left

Psalm 23:1 “The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he refreshes my soul. He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake.

Isaiah 58:11 “And the LORD will guide you continually and satisfy your desire in scorched places and make your bones strong; and you shall be like a watered garden, like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail.”

We need guidance to keep us out of trouble. (Like the helpful guides who tell you ahead of time what NOT to take pictures of before the authorities confiscate your camera.)

Psalm 121:7-8 “The Lord will keep you from all evil; he will keep your life. The Lord will keep your going out and your coming in from this time forth and forevermore.

We need guidance to know truth from lies. (I always appreciated the guides who told me when vendors were scamming me.)

John 16:13 “When the Spirit of truth comes, he will guide you into all the truth, for he will not speak on his own authority, but whatever he hears he will speak, and he will declare to you the things that are to come.”

However most important, we need guidance simply because we do not know the way.

Isaiah 42:16 “And I will lead the blind in a way that they do not know, in paths that they have not known I will guide them. I will turn the darkness before them into light, the rough places into level ground. These are the things I do, and I do not forsake them.”

Luke 1:79 “to give light to those who sit in darkness and in the shadow of death, to guide our feet into the way of peace.”

Some people find discerning God’s guidance complicated. Here are some helpful principles from Dallas Willard quoting F.B. Meyer.

“Look for three lights: circumstances, impressions of the Spirit, and passages from the Bible. Rick Warren adds ‘the godly wisdom of Christian counsel.’

‘God’s impressions within and his word without are always corroborated by His providence around, and we should quietly wait until these three focus into one point…If you do not know what you ought to do, stand still until you do. And when the time comes for action, circumstances like glowworms, will sparkle along your path. You will be so sure that you are right, when God’s three witnesses concur, that you could not be surer though an angel beckoned you on. ’F.B. Meyer”

I have always imagined it was easier when the Angel of the Lord did show up for the Abraham, Israelites, Joshua, Gideon, Zechariah, Peter, Philip. In a surprising number of these cases, the humans involved continued to question, negotiate, and argue.

So much so, that by the time Gabriel gets to Zechariah, one gets the impression he has had enough of obstinate, unbelieving humans.

Luke 1:19 And the angel answered him, “I am Gabriel. I stand in the presence of God, and I was sent to speak to you and to bring you this good news. And behold, you will be silent and unable to speak until the day that these things take place, because you did not believe my words, which will be fulfilled in their time.”

We also sometimes are asking God for directions because we don’t like the ones he has already given us.

“Does it make sense to pray for guidance about the future if we are not obeying in the thing that lies before us today? How many momentous events in Scripture depended on one person’s seemingly small act of obedience! Rest assured: Do what God tells you to do now, and, depend upon it, you will be shown what to do next.” Elisabeth Elliot

Whatever you do, don’t lose sight of your guide! (My husband teases me that when we are traveling in remote locations, I often abandon him and stick with the guide. Hey! He knows the way out!)

The great part about following our Guide is that even if we get it wrong, He can make it right.

“Guidance, like all God’s acts of blessing under the covenant of grace, is a sovereign act. Not merely does God will to guide us in the sense of showing us his way, that we may tread it; he wills also to guide us in the more fundamental sense of ensuring that, whatever happens, whatever mistakes we may make, we shall come safely home. Slippings and strayings there will be, no doubt, but the everlasting arms are beneath us; we shall be caught, rescued, restored. This is God’s promise; this is how good he is.” J.I. Packer

Love this old hymn,

Guide me, O thou great Jehovah,
pilgrim through this barren land.
I am weak, but thou art mighty;
hold me with thy powerful hand.
Bread of heaven, bread of heaven,
feed me till I want no more;
feed me till I want no more.

2. Open now the crystal fountain,
whence the healing stream doth flow;
let the fire and cloudy pillar
lead me all my journey through.
Strong deliverer, strong deliverer,
be thou still my strength and shield;
be thou still my strength and shield.

3. When I tread the verge of Jordan,
bid my anxious fears subside;
death of death and hell’s destruction,
land me safe on Canaan’s side.
Songs of praises, songs of praises,
I will ever give to thee;
I will ever give to thee.  
Text: William Williams, 1717-1791

The Ever Presence

Omnipresence is such a big word to grasp. This morning I read a definition by Priscilla Shirer that struck me in a new way.

“He’s everywhere at the same time, no less in one location than in another. All of God is where you are, every moment of every day.”

It was that idea that “ALL” of God is where I am. Somehow in my feeble brain, I guess I probably assumed that God was spread pretty thin all over the universe. Maybe more of Him was present in the important places. That He is ALL here right now, well, it is not that I don’t believe it; it’s just hard to absorb.

Throughout humanity’s encounters with God, there is this concept of entering or fleeing, from the “presence of the Lord”. What’s the point if all of God is everywhere?

Actually, David says there really isn’t a point. Psalm 139 declares that God knows us inside and out, and no matter where we go we cannot get away from Him! Not only that but He has been intricately involved in our being from the first moment of our existence onward until our final breath.

“16 Your eyes saw my unformed substance;
in your book were written, every one of them,
the days that were formed for me,
when as yet there was none of them.”

The word used to indicate seeking or fleeing the “presence of the Lord” has more to do with desiring or leaving an official audience with a king. In other words, when I seek the Lord, I am asking for an encounter, a conversation, a deliberate interaction with the King of the Universe. I am centering my ever-so-easily distracted focus on being present with Him.

On the other hand, fleeing His presence is to reject Him as my focus. It is essentially an attempt to ignore God. Jonah and others throughout history would attest that this is not a good life choice. Francis Thompson captured the futility of trying to flee God in the poem Hound of Heaven.

“I fled Him, down the nights and down the days; I fled Him, down the labyrinthine ways of my own mind; and in the mist of tears, I hid from Him.”

In spite of all that the writer indicates that he did to escape God, the ever-present Voice still reminds him in the end, “‘Ah, fondest, blindest, weakest, I am He Whom thou seekest!”

That is the point! What we desperately need, is the very presence we so often try to escape.

Psalm 46:1 God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.

Exodus 33:14, And he said, “My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.”

Acts 2:28, You have made known to me the paths of life; you will make me full of gladness with your presence.’

If we really want to LIVE, we need to stay present with the Presence!

Thoughts for Lent from a Country Parson

George Herbert’s writing may not be considered all that relevant to our times. However, a closer look at his historical setting can change that perspective.

“George Herbert (1593-1633) lived in England during the tempestuous reign of James I and Charles I that saw the nation racked by conflict among Catholics, High Churchmen, and Puritans. A member of a politically active family, Herbert rejected a promising career as a member of Parliament for the simple life of a country parson.”[i]

During a time of political upheaval and religious conflicts, Herbert walks away from it all to serve and meet the needs of a small congregation of country folks, all the while, writing about the truths God reveals to Him. I can relate to that. He sounds like my kind of guy!

During this season of Lent, I was drawn to his poem “The Sacrifice”. What he presents in it are some of the most profound paradoxes of the gospel message. Let me share some with you.

Our eyes and minds are open to the world, yet blind to Him. He took eyes in order to find us.

Those who condemned Christ did so with the very breath that He daily gave them. (Acts 17:25)

They were judging Him who is the judge of all. (Acts 10:42)

They chose a murderer over the Prince of Peace.

They spit on Him who used His own spit to heal the eyes of the blind man.

He let the soldiers deride and abuse Him while he held back heavenly legions waiting for His command. (Matthew 26:53)

He wore a crown of thorns though He was the vine planted for us.

He bore Adam’s curse so as to remove it all.

When they shouted “Crucify Him!” God held his peace and man cried out.

In Eden, man stole the fruit, now Christ must climb the tree.

As if a thief, He hung between two robbers, but all He stole from us was death. (1 Corinthians 15:55)

When He was thirsty, they gave Him vinegar and gall. When they were thirsty, He had given them water from a rock, manna, fish and loaves of bread.

Each stanza of the poem ends with “Was ever grief like mine?” While the physical suffering should never be downplayed or trivialized, neither should the psychological and emotional suffering. What I was struck by while reading this poem was the betrayal, the terrible effrontery of mankind. The horror of cruel injustice that Christ took on while having to restrain himself. He held His murderer’s breath in His hands, yet He did not take it! God held His peace and let mankind condemn Him!

1 Peter 2:21 Christ also suffered for you… 22 He committed no sin, neither was deceit found in his mouth. 23 When he was reviled, he did not revile in return; when he suffered, he did not threaten, but continued entrusting himself to him who judges justly. 24 He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, that we might die to sin and live to righteousness. By his wounds you have been healed.

He died as sin that we might die to sin and live to righteousness! The greatest paradox of all.



[i] Herbert, George. The Country Parson, The Temple. Ed. John N. Wall, Jr. Mahwah: Paulist Press, 1981.

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Earth has no sorrow that heaven cannot heal

On a recent trip to a Christian concert, we heard a song by the band Crowder with this line in the refrain. Then, as so often happens in my life when God wants to make a point with me, I encountered the same line two more times in the last couple of weeks. I am not certain if the message is for me or someone else. 

The line was originally from a poem written by Thomas Moore and later revised by Thomas Hastings to read as follows:

Come, ye disconsolate, where’er ye languish;

Come to the mercy-seat, fervently kneel;

Here bring your wounded hearts, here tell your anguish,

Earth has no sorrow that heaven cannot heal.

Joy of the comfortless, light of the straying,

Hope of the penitent, fadeless and pure;

Here speaks the Comforter, tenderly saying—

Earth has no sorrow that heaven cannot cure.

Here see the Bread of Life; see waters flowing

Forth from the throne of God, pure from above;

Come to the feast of love; come, ever knowing

Earth has no sorrow, but heaven can remove.

Then again, when I was reading a book of old sermons by Samuel Logan Brengle an early commissioner in the Salvation Army, (yes I am the sort of person who does that), I found another rendition with the same line.

Here dwells the Father; love’s waves are streaming

Forth from the throne of God, plenteous and pure;

Come to His temple for mercy redeeming;

Earth has no sorrow that He cannot cure

Here waits the Savior, gentle and loving,

Ready to meet you, His grace to reveal;

On Him your burden cast, trustfully coming;

Earth has no sorrow that Heaven cannot heal

Here speaks the Comforter, Light of the straying,

Hope of the penitent, Advocate sure;

Joy of the desolate! Tenderly saying,

Earth has no sorrow, My grace cannot cure.

You can clearly hear the Salvation Army’s redemptive message from those lines! What does all this mean except that I spend too much time with my nose in dusty old books? It’s that line, “Earth has no sorrow that heaven cannot heal”!

This world, this life, is filled with sorrow. A pastor we are associated with who was serving one of the most vibrant intercultural churches in the world died suddenly of a heart attack. Another, closer to home, lost a long battle with cancer recently.

Sorrow is part of life on this planet. But this is not the final destination! 1 Thessalonians 4:13” Brothers and sisters, we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you do not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope.”

Brengle said, “That is the message of Easter. The grave has no victory; it does not hold our treasures. To be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord, and death is but the narrow gateway into that life without tears or pain or fear of parting, to them that love the Lord…The grave has no terrors for him, for he knows he will never lie down in it- it only receives his cast-off body.”

Yet, so much pain and brokenness remain in the living all around us.  Within the small church family that we currently belong to there are four families who are raising children who are not their own. That is around fifteen children in a congregation of fewer than 100 people who are not living with their biological parents. Every Sunday I am surrounded by children who have suffered loss in a way I certainly never have.

Again the dusty hymn sings out, “Come to the mercy-seat, fervently kneel;

Here bring your wounded hearts, here tell your anguish,

Earth has no sorrow that heaven cannot heal.”

How do we cope when they lash out in angry rebellion? Can God give us the grace to realize that anger is also a stage of grief they must go through to process the losses they have experienced? That hurting people want to hurt people. Since they do not yet know the way to the mercy seat, will we bring these wounded hearts to the Father? We know that only the overwhelming love of the Heavenly Father can heal the wounded hearts of children carrying the loss of their earthly fathers. Will we surround these often overwhelmed families with prayer and practical support? As the Brengle version says,

“Here waits the Savior, gentle and loving, ready to meet you, His grace to reveal;

On Him your burden cast, trustfully coming; Earth has no sorrow that Heaven cannot heal.”

We can be the burden bearers for these families, asking God to reveal His grace in their lives.  Who lives around you? Who might God be calling you to bring hope to today? Do you know someone who is a foster parent, single mother, or a grandparent raising grandchildren? Pray for them, intercede for those children and above all believe that “Earth has no sorrow that heaven cannot heal”! (Also, take them cookies, it always helps…)

Steppin’ Out

Anyone else feel like the year 2016 has come in like a flood? That is why I am only now that it is almost February posting my first blog of the year. This week I am finally catching my breath. Within the last month family members have gone to college, moved out of the continental US, had major surgery, throw in a week of babysitting my little princesses in California and you have my month. Looking back at January, I would say that this month has been a trial of faith.  Believing that God would be faithful and come through for nearly every member of my immediate and extended family through some serious trials has been a challenge.  I am here to report- God is faithful!

Several times since the beginning of the year I have been reminded that faith often requires action on our part to reveal our belief.

Noah had to build an ark when he had never seen a flood.

Moses had to make proclamations before the Pharaoh about all the mighty works God was going to do- BEFORE God had done any.

He also had to stretch out his hand to part the sea, strike rocks for water and do a lot of other strange things simply believing God was going to do what He said He would do.

The one that keeps running through my head is Joshua and the people at the Jordan River.  God told Joshua the following:

Joshua 3:13 And when the soles of the feet of the priests bearing the ark of the Lord, the Lord of all the earth, shall rest in the waters of the Jordan, the waters of the Jordan shall be cut off from flowing, and the waters coming down from above shall stand in one heap.” 14 So when the people set out from their tents to pass over the Jordan with the priests bearing the ark of the covenant before the people, 15 and as soon as those bearing the ark had come as far as the Jordan, and the feet of the priests bearing the ark were dipped in the brink of the water (now the Jordan overflows all its banks throughout the time of harvest), 16 the waters coming down from above stood and rose up in a heap very far away, at Adam, the city that is beside Zarethan, and those flowing down toward the Sea of the Arabah, the Salt Sea, were completely cut off. And the people passed over opposite Jericho. 17 Now the priests bearing the ark of the covenant of the Lord stood firmly on dry ground in the midst of the Jordan, and all Israel was passing over on dry ground until all the nation finished passing over the Jordan.

I just keep thinking about those priests carrying the ark. God had not told them personally to stand in the river that was overflowing its banks. They were getting these instructions second-hand through Joshua, who frankly did not have the track record of the previous leader, Moses. Most of the actions of Moses had been taken at his own expense. He heard God; he did it, and he faced the consequences if it was not done properly. Now here is the new guy asking you to step in the flood waters carrying a heavy wooden box that if not handled properly would mean sudden divine destruction.  Holding the ark above water was going to require some fancy synchronized swimming if Joshua didn’t have the details right! I think I might prefer to carry the back of the box, not be the guy in front, just for today…

From this point on the actions of God through His people were going to require THEIR involvement. They were going to have to take the land. Their obedience was going to lead to defeat or victory. It was not going to be dependent on whether or not Moses held his hands up while they fought, but rather on whether Achan was stealing and lying within the camp. Joshua wasn’t going to walk up to the walls of Jericho and hit them with his stick to break rocks; the people were going to have to march around the city. No doubt they were getting stuff dumped on their heads; I doubt it was slushies.

The message I have been getting is to stop waiting for some spiritual leader to believe God for great things. It’s time to believe God for ourselves. 2016 is the year to pick up the poles of the ark and step out into the flood waters! Accept the risk of believing God to act as a result of our obedience. Know that the new territory God wants us to take this year may require overcoming opposition. However, remember Ephesians 2:10. “For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.”

God has it all ready! Let’s show up and step out into the flood of 2016.

Christmas in the Dark

Two suicides in the past week. I don’t move in large circles or have contact with hundreds of people a week. My Facebook friend list is not extensive, and I don’t have a huge Twitter following. Still in one week two people that I have a connection with have found life too unbearable to continue.  In studying psychology and counseling, we were often warned that the holidays could be some of the most difficult for those with depression.  The losses seem more poignant, loneliness is more extreme and hope harder to come by at this time of year.  Why is this? I don’t have an academic answer to offer but as someone who has clung to the edge of the black hole, let me offer some observations based on my own experience. This year I have been reminded that when the Christ child came it was very dark.

Unrealistic expectations are a huge one for me. I want the perfect family Christmas! I want all my family to be together and to be in harmony with one another.  Gifts have come to mean less and less to me over the years, but I would like to be able to give them each something meaningful. All of these expectations have about as much chance of happening as a blizzard in Georgia.  Yesterday in the sermon, the speaker was mentioning how the religious intellectuals lived so close to Bethlehem, even knew that it was the prophesied place of his birth, yet missed it. They had expectations about how their Messiah should come. It was not supposed to be in this dark, messy, downright unsanitary fashion.  I guess I need to let this Christmas come however God intends that it should.

This year especially, it seems that the world and the US, in particular, are such a mess. Terrorists, chaos, refugees, government decisions, violence, anger and fear seem rampant.  Listening to the rhetoric from so-called Christians who would rather shoot their enemies then follow Christ’s command to love them makes me heart-sick. Something as simple as finding a college for my senior for next year became this week a cause for alarm and concern. Why must we always be choosing between the lesser of two evils?  Maybe this is how Joseph felt when the oppressive occupying Roman government decreed a tax that not only made it difficult financially but required travel with his full term pregnant wife. Should he choose to defy the authorities, or travel when it might harm his wife and her child, should he choose a shed or try to make her keep going? Should he believe the strange visions he had, maybe he was delusional, over his wife’s obvious infidelity.   Then there was one that made them refugees fleeing into Egypt. It must have seemed to Joseph that there were no good choices, only hard ones.  BUT GOD, was still accomplishing His purpose to bring salvation to the world! God is still in this current world mess accomplishing that same purpose! I must believe that, or I will sink into despair.

We can become so overwhelmed this time of year with doing good things that we do not see people. If we do not take the time to stay in tune to the Spirit, we will not realize when someone is at their breaking point. We will just be, like the innkeeper, too busy.  Not an evil, vile, cruel person just preoccupied with taking care of our own business.  Anna, on the other hand, was so tuned in to the voice of God that when the poor shabby couple who looked like they had been living in a barn brought the offering of the poorest to circumcise their insignificant eight-day-old child; she knew! She was able to offer them the voice of hope to believe the unbelievable words they had been given.  It is what so many people need to hear! There is a future that God has for you, and a place that you need to fill in His plan.  You are necessary, and needed even if what you have to offer seems pitiful by all the world’s standards.

It was a dark night, in a land with an oppressive, God-less government. A baby would have to be born in a barn.  The senseless killing of innocent babies would result from the unbelief of pagan rulers.  Joseph would have to choose to make his families refugees.  God knew Christmas would come in the dark.

So He ripped open heaven and poured out the announcement with gleaming multitude of glorious beings! To Mary and Joseph’s loneliness and fear came the shepherds which at the least indicated that God still knew where they were. He affirmed the message of His purpose through Anna and Simeon when they brought Jesus to the temple in spite of their paltry gift.  He sent the shining gifts from strangers to pay the way for them to escape to Egypt. He was there breaking through into the darkness again and again.

Now we are the bearers of the light of God. Help us, Father, to let go of all our expectations, to see hurting people even while we are taking care of our business, to believe that You are still accomplishing Your salvation even in this dark world. Help us to trust You will guide us even when all our options seem hard.  Help us to keep bringing our babies to the temple even when our offering is pathetic in our eyes. Make us purveyors of hope who will grab the hands of those on the brink of despair and tell them we still need them.  God has a place for them.

This seems the carol for this year:   

I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day
Their old familiar carols play,
And wild and sweet the words repeat
Of peace on earth, good will to men.

And in despair I bowed my head:
“There is no peace on earth,” I said,
“For hate is strong and mocks the song
Of peace on earth, good will to men.”

Then pealed the bells more loud and deep:
“God is not dead, nor doth he sleep;
The wrong shall fail, the right prevail,
With peace on earth, good will to men.”

Till, ringing singing, on its way,
The world revolved from night to day,
A voice, a chime, a chant sublime,
Of peace on earth, good will to men!

(Henry Wadsworth Longfellow (1807-1882), 1867)

Till We Have Faces

I have just finished reading C.S. Lewis’s book, Till We Have Faces[i]. A troubling story, to say the least, where Lewis remakes the classical myth of Cupid and Psyche.

One of many aspects it portrays through the two sisters is the search for love. Orual representing the earthly grasping, at best jealous, selfish love of humanity apart from God, and Psyche the search for Divine love, which requires the giving over of one’s self in utter abandonment. The title is reported to have been taken from the scripture in 1 Corinthian 13:12, “For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. 13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.”

The difficulty is in seeing yourself clearly and in exposing that self as ugly as “Ungit” in the story. Orual attempted to write her story giving her complaint, even accusation, toward the gods. Similarly, I have often “written” myself out on the page as much to see my thoughts and motives in black and white, as to share any newly acquired insight.

“When the time comes to you at which you will be forced at last to utter the speech which has lain at the center of your soul for years, which you have, all that time, idiot like, been saying over and over, you’ll not talk about joy of words. I saw well why the gods do not speak to us openly, nor let us answer. Till that word be dug out of us why should they hear the babble that we think we mean? How can they meet us face to face until we have faces?”

I felt arrested by this statement. I know the complaint that I have so often rehearsed; my very own personal Job’s accusation that God had somehow been unfair! The reality hit me that it was not until I had written it into a story literally, uttered the speech which had lain at the center of my soul for years, which I had, all that time, idiot like, been saying over and over” that I saw the truth of it for the first time. It was “dug out” of me! Orual says it well,

“The change which the writing wrought in me (and of which I did not write) was only a beginning; only to prepare me for the gods’ surgery. They used my own pen to probe my wound. ”

It is hard to accept that the love that you think you have- may be jealous, manipulative, even at times, cruel. The hardest reality is that it may also become a barrier to someone else’s pursuit of God. As Lewis says,

“For mortals, as you said, will become more and more jealous. And mother, and wife, and child and friend will all be in league to keep a soul from being united with the Divine Nature.”

Seeing oneself as truly exposed before God, does away instantly with any thought of demanding from God justice for the supposed wrongs or slights we would accuse Him of allowing. Orual ask the question,

“Are the gods not just?” Her teacher the Fox replies, “Oh no, child. What would become of us if they were?”

It is no slight coincidence to me that I have been meditating on where James says, “mercy triumphs over judgment”.

Again Micah 7:18 takes it even a step further, “You do not stay angry forever but delight to show mercy.” Mercy triumphs over judgment is not a bad refrain to get stuck in your head.

Orual ended her first book of accusation with the words, “no answer”. She ended her second book after her encounter with the Divine Nature as follows,

“I know now, Lord, why you utter no answer. You are yourself the answer. Before your face questions die away.”

[i] Lewis, C. S. Till We Have Faces. Orlando: Harcourt, 1956, 1984.