Togetherness!

In a wonderful old romantic comedy called How to Steal a Million, featuring the recently deceased Peter O’Toole and Audrey Hepburn; the hero states, “the code word is togetherness!”

That thought has been on my mind all this holiday season; not just because we have guests who are brave enough to cram into our little apartment here for a visit, but also because having family here is what makes it Christmas for me. My love language is time spent together. So even though fixing Christmas dinner is an exercise in juggling and gymnastics in my miniscule kitchen, the fact that I was fixing it with my daughter’s help made it a meaningful memory for me.

God was in favor of togetherness. He sent us at Christmas, Emmanuel, God with us. I want to remember that this year, no matter how cramped and uncomfortable my circumstances; He is with me. That means love to me! The God who so wanted to be close to us that He sent His spirit to live within us said,

John 14:16-20 (ESV)

16 And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Helper, to be with you forever, 17 even the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees him nor knows him. You know him, for he dwells with you and will be in you.

18 “I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you. 19 Yet a little while and the world will see me no more, but you will see me. Because I live, you also will live. 20 In that day you will know that I am in my Father, and you in me, and I in you.

That is what I call TOGETHERNESS!

Merry Christmas everyone! May you come to know Emmanuel; remember the code word is togetherness!

For Women Only!

Anytime you title something like this, some men cannot resist reading. You know who you are- now go away; you will just be bored and disrupt the class!

There are many places in the world where women are still oppressed and marginalized if not blatantly abused. I was reminded this week as I read the Christmas story how different it is with God. God understands women and their needs. This is apparent from the moment Gabriel announced the birth of Christ to Mary and throughout the life and ministry of Jesus. In particular, I was impressed as I read Gabriel’s announcement that God understood Mary needed a friend. Joseph would need divine intervention before he could overcome his male ego and wounded pride; he certainly was not in a place where he could be supportive. He may have even been worried about her sanity with all the talk of angel visitations, thinking, “You know, maybe I should just have her ‘put away’.”

What is a girl to do?  Gabriel gave her a hint…Elizabeth understands that nothing is impossible with God; she is also going through a divine moment in her life. That was all the encouragement Mary needed. Yes, Elizabeth was family, but God was also preparing her to be the friend Mary would need.

What made Elizabeth the perfect example of whom to turn to in a crisis?

Several things are apparent in the scripture. She was “righteous before God, walking blamelessly in all the commandments and statutes of the Lord”. (Luke 1 ESV) We need to know that our friend is in touch with God and able to give Godly counsel.

She also had held on to her faith in spite of a great trial in her life. Her faith in God had been tested by years of infertility. “But they had no child, because Elizabeth was barren, and both were advanced in years.” Hers was a tested mature faith that had held on to God even though she had not received what she so desperately wanted. She must have loved God for Himself and not for what she could get from Him. A friend who will help you to remain strong in faith is invaluable.

She knew how to keep a secret, even one that overwhelmed her with wonder and joy. “24 After these days his wife Elizabeth conceived, and for five months she kept herself hidden, saying, 25 “Thus the Lord has done for me in the days when he looked on me to take away my reproach among people.” We all need another woman we can trust with our burdens, secrets, even our shame.

God even gave Elizabeth confirmation that Mary’s child was of God. What a tremendous gift that was to Mary! Then Elizabeth could give Mary her full support with no small doubt in her mind.  Mary desperately needed someone who would believe her, and believe in her. “Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb! 43 And why is this granted to me that the mother of my Lord should come to me?” What strength it must have given Mary to know that Elizabeth believed she could be the mother of the “Lord”.

Elizabeth was not swayed from her commitment to the word of God by public opinion; as when she refused to give in to pressure when it came time to name John. “59 And on the eighth day they came to circumcise the child. And they would have called him Zechariah after his father, 60 but his mother answered, “No; he shall be called John.” 61 And they said to her, “None of your relatives is called by this name.” Who better to stand with Mary against the pressure she would face, then someone who could truly believe the confirmation God gave her? 

For three months, you know those first three months when morning sickness makes you think you are going to die, Mary was in a safe place. She was cared for and caring for someone who understood. What a gift from the God who understands what a woman needs!

Do you need an Elizabeth in your life? Ask God to give you a suggestion, like Gabriel did for Mary.

Waiting in Hope

For 400 years between the Old and New Testament, people waited in hope for a promised Messiah. The concept of waiting in hope seems so much a part of Christmas. As a child growing up in a western culture, anticipation of Christmas was half the fun. Advent calendars counted down the days as we waited in hope for the joy of Christmas Day. 

God seemed to realize how difficult it would be for us to maintain a hopeful spirit in our times of waiting, and so throughout his word he spoke of our need for courage and strength as we wait.

Psalm 27:14 (AMP) Wait and hope for and expect the Lord; be brave and of good courage and let your heart be stout and enduring. Yes, wait for and hope for and expect the Lord.

Psalm 31:24 (AMP) Be strong and let your heart take courage, all you who wait for and hope for and expect the Lord!

God also seemed to recognize the depth of the agony of spirit we can experience as David spoke in Psalm 42:5 (AMP). Why are you cast down, O my inner self? And why should you moan over me and be disquieted within me? Hope in God and wait expectantly for Him, for I shall yet praise Him, my Help and my God.

In the beautiful way that the New Testament seems to answer the heart cries of the Old, Romans 8:24-26 (ESV) seems it could have been written specifically to address the need David expressed.

24 For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? 25 But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.

26 Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.

What have you been waiting for that seems to have developed into an inner moan? The Spirit understands that you do not even know how to pray anymore, and He will take that need to the Father with groaning too deep for words. In the meantime, watch for those signs of God at work. In other words, engage in being hopeful. I love the words of Sarah Groves’s song, It Might be Hope.

You do your work the best that you can
You put one foot in front of the other
Life comes in waves and makes its demands
You hold on as well as your able

You’ve been here for a long long time
Hope has a way of turning its face to you
Just when you least expect it
You walk in a room
You look out a window
And something there leaves you breathless
You say to yourself
It’s been a while since I felt this
But it feels like it might be hope
It’s hard to recall what blew out the flame
It’s been dark since you can remember
You talk it all through to find it a name
As days go on by without number
You’ve been here for a long long time
Hope has a way of turning its face to you
Just when you least expect it
You walk in a room
You look out a window
And something there leaves you breathless
You say to yourself
It’s been a while since I felt this
But it feels like it might be hope

Taking Offense

What does it mean to take offense? Various online dictionaries define it as follows:

 To feel (and usually to show) emotional pain and resentment at another’s actions or words.

Confession time, I recently took offense when someone’s behavior triggered some painful memories for me. How could he act that way? He seemed to be intentionally inflicting emotional pain, and I resented it deeply. I guess I am in good company; the disciples even took offense with Jesus when He began to teach them things they did not want to hear. John 6:60-61

60 When many of his disciples heard it, they said, “This is a hard saying; who can listen to it?” 61 But Jesus, knowing in himself that his disciples were grumbling about this, said to them, “Do you take offense at this?

So what would have been the better response on my part in dealing with the offense?  How could I keep my heart clean of the dark film that resentment would bring? Surely, bitterness must be the next step beyond resentment. 

Solomon seems to say that we have a choice; we can use love to cover the offense, overlook it, not share it with others, and above all keep calm. (He was a wise man…)

Proverbs 10:12 Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all offenses.

Proverbs 17:9 Whoever covers an offense seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates close friends.

Proverbs 19:11 Good sense makes one slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offense.

Ecclesiastes 10:4 If the anger of the ruler rises against you, do not leave your place, for calmness will lay great offenses to rest.

Basically, offenses will come to us. We will be offended by the words and actions of other. Offenses will come, but we do not have to “take” them into ourselves. The hurtful comments do not have to find a place in our identity. I can choose to let love cover the offense by believing the person was only acting out of the hurt he was feeling. (See Hurting People)

I can choose not to “take” the offense to others thereby spreading the resentment. Again, a choice characterized as seeking love.

The offense can be overlooked if I choose not to “take” it into my view of the person so that all my future encounters with this person are colored by this event.

Mainly, I need to keep calm, give the hurt to the Healer, and find a place of rest in my spirit through forgiveness.